Two Stories With The Word Hug

Here are two very fresh/recent little anecdotes:

#1
This guy at work comes to ask me to do something for him. I've seen him before but I never got to know him. He's fairly new and seems like a super nice guy. Anyways, so he comes and talks to me about something, showing me a piece of paper. Then all of a sudden, he starts stuttering. Stuttering is really an understatement. He just kept repeating same 2 words... for a looong time. I thought it was a glitch in the Matrix at first cause his stutter wavelength, if you will, was identical each time. I couldn't take my eyes off the paper cause I did not want to embaress him.

So he's still stuck on those 2 words, and I feel like if I interupt his stutter pattern in any way, he might go back to normal. So I say a few meaningless words just to knock this stutter out of balance. It works, and after maybe 30 seconds of saying the same 2 words he goes back to normal. I look up at his face and I can tell he is trying hard to act normal and pretend like nothing has happened. His eyes were a little teary and he couldn't look me straight in the eye. He looked so vulnerable I just want to hug him, pat on his back, and tell him "it's ok, don't be ashamed, man... I would never judge you or laugh at you... we all have our imperfections" Of course I couldn't do any of that so I just played along like nothing happened at all.

#2
I was invited to a little birthday party at a restaurant, for this girl I knew. It was ok, I got to talk to people that I haven't talked to in a loooong time. The birthday girl was a sweet & cute girl that I never got to know very well. I had a few pointless, Egyptian style, discussions with some of the invitees, and realized how much we all have changed yet how unbridgable the gap between us still is. So me and my friend decided to call it a night and go home. So we get up and start the goodbye rituals. I look at the birthday girl, she looks at me, and we approach for the farewell.

Now I was going for double-cheek Egyptian kiss but apparently, she was going for the one-armed hug. So we come closer, she reaches out with her left arm for the hug, at the same time I grab her right hand for the hand shake and lean forward for the first cheek kiss. She puts her arm on my back but she realizes that I am going for the double-cheek . And I realize that she's going for the one-armed. So we each change our strategies! I lean back thinking that what we just did counts as the one-armed hug, even though we shook hands and I already simulated the kiss sound. However, she was now going for the double-cheek thinking that this is what I wanted. So as I go back to the straight position, she leans in, pulling me with her left hand, trying for the second cheek kiss. But since I stood my ground, and since I'm a bit taller than her, she ends up basically just hugging my right arm and ramming her face in my shoulder! Everytime I think about it I keep laughing at how pathetic I can be...